Episode Transcript
[00:00:01] Speaker A: Listeners of the Tribe podcast, this is your host, Rashad Woods. Today I have a very special guest today, a man that helped, that helps people get to reach their highest potential. Entrepreneur, tech speaker all around solid good guy, Eli Bowman, ladies and gentlemen.
[00:00:18] Speaker B: Thank you so much, Rashad. Man, I'm glad, I'm glad I'm here.
[00:00:21] Speaker A: I'm excited, man. You know, you really have a very inspiring story that comes from a pure place because you help inspire people and get people to. Who are stuck, who are trying to get to that next level and don't have a way out of it. So can you tell your story how you got into that field of work?
[00:00:39] Speaker B: Yeah, it really, it was, it was, it was more so me being in my own sort of crisis moment where, you know, I, I had a company and we were scaling with, with one big customer and we had a meeting with them and they were like, yeah, that's scale together. And then the following week they just pulled the rug right, right from underneath us, went with.
And I had kind of built my business around that kind of volume. And, and so I was looking at it now. What, what was, what was now an upload uploaded company and, and no revenue to match the, the spend on the size of the company, over 40 employees. And I, I was just looking at everything. I thought, what in the world am I going to do here? So I was in a crisis moment. And of all people, my tax strategist, who I thought was, was just a numbers person, you know, she said, hey, look, I can tell you're, you're not. Okay, so there's this event going on in Dallas. And you know, why don't you go there? It's like, it's called, it's an NLP event. I said, what's nlp? She said, it's Neuro Linguistic programming. I'd heard of it with like, yeah, I would. I heard about it with like, like sales talks and marketing and things like that in like, communication. I heard good things about it.
[00:01:51] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:01:52] Speaker B: I said, you know, I need something. So I said, how long is this? She said, a week. I said, a week? That's a long event.
But I was like, I need it. So I go down there and I'm sitting in the room in the first day, Rashad. And as I'm there, I'm like listening. I'm talking to people. Everyone around me is like a coach, a mentor, a consultant, a therapist or something.
They're working with people and like, they're all in these fields where they already have these established clienteles. And I'm like, I'm just, I'm just a business owner, like, feel a little out of place. And I came to learn a little bit after that that it was a certification event for those type of people to kind of further their career, to add, to add more expertise to what they do.
[00:02:39] Speaker A: Right.
[00:02:39] Speaker B: And I had to make a decision. I was like, do I stay?
And I was like, man, I need something. So I stayed and I'm so glad I did. And this is, this is, this is how I'm going to answer your question here.
I.
That's how I got into that body of work, the neuro linguistic programming body of work. And it answered so many questions I had about myself. It explained so many things about my life that I had never really considered before, but had all these missing pieces and they all just fit. NLP answered so much for me. And so I was like, I gotta use this, I gotta use this moving forward to help other people. And that's kind of how I, I started in that, you know, down that road.
[00:03:22] Speaker A: Yeah. I think sometimes people can, for lack of a better term. I've said this on other podcasts, people can autopilot it, right? Because you know, you have a structured environment for a long time. You know, whether you go to elementary, whether you go to college, and then, you know, you transition to post college and now all of a sudden you've always kind of just followed a schedule or followed a regimen and now you mentally can kind of coast and kind of cap your potential because either A, life, family, kids, etc takes over or B, you fall into habits or, or not reaching your potential because you're tired, you're fatigued, and life just sort of happened. And even though you're a successful business owner, I've heard this from other successful business people, it still happens to them, right. You know, they're always chasing the next sale, but they never focused on them and their personal growth.
[00:04:16] Speaker B: Yeah, that is so true. In fact, in fact, I write about this. You know, I call it the conveyor belt. I'm not the first to call it that, but. Because that imagery has been used. But, but it really is, Rashad. Like there's like this very clear, there's almost this implied promise.
[00:04:31] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:04:32] Speaker B: That if you do xyz, if you go to school, graduate, get married, get a good job, get the mortgage, get the car, have the kids, like there's this implied promise that joy and happiness will come from.
That's the measure of fulfillment of life.
[00:04:49] Speaker A: And it's sold on TV and shows.
[00:04:51] Speaker B: And commercials 100 it is. Absolutely. And that further deepens the programming that we have, that it's the way that it's the path. But it's not, because it's not, it's not something that it's manufactured from outside of us, Rashad. It's not something that comes from within.
[00:05:07] Speaker A: Right.
[00:05:07] Speaker B: And that's why for so many people, it doesn't feel happy.
[00:05:13] Speaker A: Right.
[00:05:14] Speaker B: It might feel good enough. I'm not saying that people are miserable necessarily. Some people are, though. Yeah, some people are. They live, as the old author says, lives of quiet desperation. Quiet desperation.
[00:05:26] Speaker A: Well, that really hit hard, you know that really.
[00:05:28] Speaker B: I know. It hits hard when you think about it. And then like, when, when you hear that, how easy is it to look back on your life and for me to look back on my life and go, oh, yeah, there lots of stretches where I was quietly desperate, didn't say a word, and just kept trucking along because, like, I was in that, on that conveyor belt of what I thought I should be doing.
Of course, I was confused. Like, where the heck, where the heck's my joy? I've done all these things. Usually it's a lot, My happiness. Darn it.
[00:05:55] Speaker A: You're just a lot more expletive given than that. You know what I mean?
[00:05:59] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:06:00] Speaker A: You know, you know, but like, it's, it's always like that Jerry Maguire feeling like, where's your quirk Quan at? Right? Because, you know, there's, there's a reason why, you know, I, I, I've said this to other guests. I have a black belt in tang sudo karate, Korean karate. I have brown belt and taekwondo, and I've done Brazilian jiu jitsu and muay Thai. And even if you're not a professional fighter, even if you're not going to reach that upper echelon, you're still chasing something, right? Because you got guys that do martial arts, and they're like, hey, man, I got this successful job. I got the kids. Why are you here? Because they're like, dude, I have to have, there's something I have to pursue. There's, there's a next level to something that I haven't accomplished yet. And to your point, once you sit around long enough and you scroll through all those streaming apps, man, that's a doom cycle. It's a doom. Oh, dude, it's the worst. You're like, are you serious? Like, and then you just sit there for an hour and a half. Won't even know where that hour and.
[00:06:51] Speaker B: A half went for real. Oh, gosh. It's true. Yes.
Right.
[00:06:57] Speaker A: So you. You go to this course, right, and you're. You're out of place, right? And it has to be kind of awkward because you have all these therapists, these doctors, these attorneys, all these people, and you're like, how did you, like, break that barrier to where, like, okay, I deserve to be here and I can do this?
[00:07:14] Speaker B: Well, I'd already paid for it and booked the hotel and in the airfare.
No, you know, in all serious. In all seriousness, though, it was. It really was bred from a place of desperation and. Or necessity. Necessity is the mother of all invention, right? I mean, I think Benjamin Franklin's credited with that.
I was so I was just in a place where I needed to figure myself out. It's like, well, if I'm not gonna. If this business is going to.
When this happened, and I didn't say this, but I was. I don't normally share this, but I'll share this here. When. When that rug was pulled out from underneath me, you would think that you just. You would think that I would feel crushed, that I would feel just super sad, super depressed. I felt nothing.
I felt numb. Just numb.
And I wondered why that was. That was part of the reason I got. I kind of went into a crisis moment because instead of feeling destroyed, like, who I was is like, instead of my identity being completely dismantled, I just felt nothing. And in fact, there were echoes, Rashad, of relief.
Echoes of relief.
And so that caused me to question. I'm like, well, if I feel these echoes of relief amidst the sea of numbness, what does that mean? So that's why I stayed. That's why I stayed. And, you know, that was just that. That was the first certification, first level. I took my education in that body of work. I've taken it as far as I can go. I have a master designation now and truly am an expert now in nlp and because I just love the body of work so much, and it's been so fun helping clients and helping. Helping groups. It's been incredible.
[00:08:59] Speaker A: What, you know, what's the typical. You know, I don't say typical. It's disrespectful.
What stage do most clients you. You talk to? Are they at. Are they at that quote, unquote, midlife crisis? Is it that successful business owner that's looking to expand? Is it that. Is it that couple that's, you know, on the rock, so to speak? Or is it a person that looks back and reflects and said, I should have did this more.
[00:09:24] Speaker B: Usually by the time they come to me, they are aware of their unfulfillment.
And so a lot of times I, when they think of me, they sort of think of, of purpose and fulfillment and like trying to, trying to get their life to a place where they love it.
And, and, and that's, that's what I specialize in. So when they're, when I'm starting with them, they're, they have a, they have an increased self awareness.
They've. They've realized, okay, my life isn't exactly what I want it to be.
[00:09:54] Speaker A: Right.
[00:09:55] Speaker B: It's not what I want it to be. I don't really know how to make that shift into like living a life that I actually really enjoy because I don't know where to begin because I'm doing all the things I was told to do.
[00:10:05] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And, you know, and that's, that's where.
[00:10:08] Speaker B: They are when they come to me.
[00:10:09] Speaker A: Well, it's funny when you say that, you know, you get things, you do what you're supposed to do. You know, back in the day when people did stuff that was odd or out of the pocket, so to speak, I, I just think of like high school, right? Everybody was geared towards the high school counselor. And they have like. With your selection of colleges, right? And then next, you know, you already are. You don't even know you're programmed when it's happening. You don't even. It's not even.
[00:10:30] Speaker B: That's right.
[00:10:31] Speaker A: You have no clue, right? And it's like there's something to be said of somebody who catches it at 15 or 16, that's like either in their kitchen or working on the cars on the weekend and they just got it. They just like. And it's so implicitly in their DNA, you know, that they're not on that. I'm not dis in college, but you get where I'm going here. They're all going to the same class. Yeah, I do have to. You have to write the prep. You know, I gotta, I gotta make sure I stay up to 3 o' clock in the morning to get this paper done and do this group project. And then once I get my degree, everything else works itself out and I think there's something to be said and I don't want to talk too much from you that that's all blown up in a lot of people's faces, right? And five years after that, mid-20s, early-30s, they're like, wait a minute, man, the joke's on me. So to speak. You know what I'm saying. Yeah, you know.
[00:11:21] Speaker B: Yes, two things about that. What you said is really profound because first I want to touch on how we don't even know you had mentioned like the programming gets installed. We don't even realize it. You're absolutely right. And then I want to talk about what happens at that like late 20s, early 30s stage and what people can do. So the, so when we're 0 to 7 years old, our brains really operate in, in a like, like, like a theta wavelength which by the way is the same like sort of brain wavelength that hypnotists will put adults in when they're hypnotizing them.
[00:11:58] Speaker A: Oh wow. I did not know that.
[00:11:59] Speaker B: So how suggestible are we from 0 to 7? The answer is tremendously. We're sponges when we hear it. It is a very high likelihood, high likelihood. It gets installed right into us. And so from 0 to 7 and 0 to 8, you know, it's, it's debatable. But that, that area is, we are, that's where the, the vast majority, the bulk of our deep seated programming is made. The way we see the world, the way we see kind of life, the way we see our relationships, so much of it is informed during those years.
And then, so we live our life according to that programming. And then you're right, late 20s, into the 30s, people start to gain an increased awareness of the dis. What I call the internal dissonance, which is what they're doing every day isn't matching the life that they actually want to live. So there's a, there's a delta there.
[00:12:53] Speaker A: Right.
[00:12:53] Speaker B: And but here's what people, this is what a lot of these people, a lot of my clients were people who did the following.
They hit that point where the realization was made and then they just persisted in that dissonance for a number of years.
And by doing so, because they were, you're, you're on a trajectory period. And so be. No matter what, you're on a trajectory.
[00:13:19] Speaker A: Absolutely.
[00:13:20] Speaker B: Because their trajectory was going further from the, the life they actually wanted.
The stress, intention and pain created by the delta between those two things is what makes the pain higher than staying the same. So when, when the pain of changing is higher than the pain of staying the same, you will change period. Because we, we stop pain, you know, as a martial artist, you know what I'm talking about, we stop pain when we hurt. We guard against it.
[00:13:53] Speaker A: Absolutely. 150%.
[00:13:55] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:13:55] Speaker A: 150.
[00:13:56] Speaker B: 150%.
[00:13:57] Speaker A: Yeah. It's.
[00:13:58] Speaker B: And so like it's it's sad to see people persist so long in a life that isn't of their design simply because they think they have to, and even sadder because they don't know how to do anything different. And that's where I come in.
[00:14:11] Speaker A: A lot of times it happens too, because depending on where you grew up or where you live from, you know, and you know, this is that there's. There may only be one structured environment that they've only seen, right? There may only. And it's not. I don't want to say that in a bad way, right? But if you sit back and say.
[00:14:26] Speaker B: Hey, it's just all they know.
[00:14:27] Speaker A: All you know, right? And you know, like, you, you take the same vacation, you know, within four or five hours, and life is, quote, unquote, good, right? And then like you said, people start to. It's almost like the Matrix, right? Where like, you, you know, the guy's walking like, wait, wait, wait a minute. There's other things out there. There's other experiences out there. I said to one, I said to one of my kids, I have three daughters, right? And I told him, I said, listen, you know, obviously I want you to be successful when you become a, you know, when you get older. I said, truly, if you don't know what to do when you graduate from high school and you're on the fence about college, I said, get a. Get on a plane, a car or a train, and figure and hit water and then figure it out in between when you hit a coast and you know what I'm saying, it sounds cool. It sounds like, it sounds like a like Of Mice and Men type novel, right? But it's like, listen before you, like, settle down and say, I have to be on this college campus. And if you want to, that's. That's on you. But if you're like, man, you know, I kind of need to figure it out.
I don't care if you go east, west or south to figure it out. And then, you know what I mean? Because that could be your moment to capture that.
[00:15:35] Speaker B: So true. And there's something about, there's something about that travel. There's something about seeing the world. There's something about expanding your.
Your own personal horizon, like going past that. There's something about that that totally changes the way you think. I'm 100% with you.
[00:15:49] Speaker A: Why not? What's the worst that happens? Like, you know, like, because it's interesting. And I don't. Like I said, this is so fascinating because I could. I see it, you know, there's so, it's so relatable, you know, here you are at 17, 18 years old, you graduated from high school, right. And then three months later, you're on a college campus. And that is, you may not mentally be ready to just be able to do that. Like you're in your parents basement, you know what I'm saying? Like the next, you know, yeah, I'm at this college and I'm supposed to do this every single day. Like, dude, man, like really, like I spent 6, 15, 14 years of my life in school, and now you're telling me I got to go to school again to be valuable in life, in society.
[00:16:29] Speaker B: Right. My, that's how my go into tremendous amounts of debt in order to do it if I'm not one of the lucky ones that has a totally full.
[00:16:36] Speaker A: Right, right, right. And I, you know, and I don't run a 4 4. I can't dunk a basketball. And I, you know, I can't, you know.
[00:16:42] Speaker B: Right.
[00:16:42] Speaker A: And God bless the people that can. Right? So like, sure, sure. You start becoming that number.
[00:16:49] Speaker B: Right?
[00:16:50] Speaker A: And.
[00:16:50] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:16:51] Speaker A: And being that number. And I'm sure you've heard people say that. I realize that I'm just a number, you know, and so.
[00:16:57] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:16:58] Speaker A: How. So how have you turned that to positives for people once they reach that inflection point, so to speak?
[00:17:06] Speaker B: Well, I think it starts with, with like me being able to even speak to that myself. I feel like a good friend of mine, Rory Vaden, he says this, he says you are best positioned to help the person you once were.
[00:17:19] Speaker A: Oh, snap.
[00:17:20] Speaker B: And I think, I think about who I once was. And you know, I went to, I went to college. I graduated from the business school at the Ohio State University, worked in corporate finance and was straight conveyor belted, like to the max.
And then when I was in corporate America, I would work long hours, I would come home just in time for dinner, catch a little bit of time with my kids, go back to work because they did not let us have laptops back then, and go back to the office until about 12, come back, sleep, wake up, do it all over again.
Um, and so when someone comes to me and they're like, hey, like, I'm starting to realize that I'm sort of stuck in this, what Kiyosaki calls the rat race. You're like, yeah. I'm like, look, I've been there. I. I know what it feels like. I know what it feels like to just. You don't even know when it ends. You just think, oh there's, there's a career ladder where I work and that's just, you're just oriented to like how do I increase my, my, my ranking in the company and, and therefore how do I increase my income within this ecosystem of this corporation?
And man, it's just talk about needing to go to the coast.
That, that, that narrow mindedness that, that tunnel vision is going to, it's, it's not going to, I would say most of the time, almost all the time. It's not going to result in a life of total fulfillment because it's just not a life of your design. You're playing by the rules of someone else's game. You can only do that so long shod until that, until there's that inner dissonance and that, that delta, that pain of the life you really, really, truly want to live and the life you're actually living that's going to start rearing its head pretty quick.
[00:19:10] Speaker A: Well, I think also what happens too is like, you know, I've had the fortunate distinction of talking to a lot of, you know, a wide variety of people. So you know, I've talked to people who are professional musicians, right. And one thing that you know, you know, and I say this, you know, imagine tell you know, back in, maybe it's better now, I don't know enough to speak on it, but tell your parents say I'm going to play music for a living. Right. And you're not, you know, they automatically have in their head the starving artist that's you know, you know, on the corner of course or you know, on the subway station or oh, you're going to write poetry and make money off. Like how are you going to live off that? Just do this instead. So it comes from yes, a place of nurturing, but it's also come from a place of a little bit of a safety net sort of thing where just go where it's safe. You know, don't go past this certain level in the pool because you might, you can, they tell you you can drown in a feet of water, right. So like it comes to, from a place of purity, of helpfulness, but it also comes from a place of hindrance because I want to see what you didn't do, what wasn't shown to me.
Mm.
[00:20:11] Speaker B: Yeah. Gosh, this reminds Gary, Gary Vaynerchuk. I don't think anyone preaches this louder from the rooftops than Gary V.
He talks about the impact your parents have on you. Now Gary Vee is not trained in nlp. But he's on to something. He's right. Because we so often are crippled by the expectations of our parents.
But here's the rub, man. Here's where it gets tricky. As parents, we. And you're a father.
[00:20:36] Speaker A: Yes, absolutely.
[00:20:37] Speaker B: Like, there's a base instinct to protect.
And so we naturally, without even thinking about it, Rashad, we. We do everything we can to mitigate.
[00:20:49] Speaker A: Risk exposure for 150.
[00:20:52] Speaker B: And it takes a concerted effort, even when they're young, to let them climb the thing that they could fall down from. It takes. It takes work for us to go, okay, just let them go. Let them climb because they have to fall down. They got to skin their knee. They got to do it to learn. They just won't learn otherwise.
[00:21:14] Speaker A: It's so funny you mentioned that, because, you know, I remember when one of my. My. I have three daughters and my middle daughter wanted to climb a certain high ride at an amusement park. And she's like, you know, five. And I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. And she had a complete. Like, I can do this. And then next, you know, you see her do it. And I'm like, I did that without even.
It did even dawn on me, like, what if that moment hindered you with everything else you do in life? Because psychologically, you were told that you weren't supposed to do something that could put you in harm's way. Not something. I'm not talking about jumping off buildings and doing back. We're not talking about that.
[00:21:49] Speaker B: Sure.
[00:21:49] Speaker A: We're talking about basic, like, hey, can I. Let me see if I can climb that hill. And if I, you know, get a couple bumps and bruises along the way. So what. Right?
[00:21:58] Speaker B: And, yes. And what behavior do you think that. How do you think that exhibits as adults? It exhibits this way.
Risk aversion.
[00:22:09] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:22:10] Speaker B: Why would I. Why would I start that business?
It's scary.
[00:22:13] Speaker A: I.
[00:22:14] Speaker B: It could hurt. I could fall down. You know, all of these metaphors, right? Like. Like, mom. Mom and dad, you know, warn me against risk, and that feels unsafe. So therefore, because it's unsafe, because I don't know that I can't tell the outcome, I'm going to not act.
[00:22:29] Speaker A: Exactly.
[00:22:30] Speaker B: And, man, that doesn't serve us because that also translates into, I'm not going to apply for that new. That other job that probably will pay better or be better. I'm not going to, you know, make this change in my life. I'm not going to leave this relationship, even though it's toxic and harms me, because I don't know what's out there.
[00:22:46] Speaker A: Safe to a degree.
[00:22:48] Speaker B: Right. It's the devil we, we, we prefer the devil we know over the devil we don't.
[00:22:54] Speaker A: Absolutely.
[00:22:55] Speaker B: And that's what we, we learned that as kids. And that's, that's the rub. And that's. Let me close that loop. Because with parents, we have this base instinct to protect. And so believe even though that comes from a place of love and nurturing and is biologically necessary and hardwired into us, there is 100% an impact in our children's lives from the way we parent simply because of the inclination we have to keep them safe.
Ain't that just a son of a gun? Because, because there's no way around.
[00:23:29] Speaker A: Right?
[00:23:29] Speaker B: It's about so part, part of increasing our self awareness, Rashad, is recognizing that no matter who we are, we're going to have to.
Some kids have to touch the stove to know it's hot. Some kids can see another kid touch the stove and see it's hot and they'll learn.
I'm, I'm someone that has to touch.
[00:23:49] Speaker A: The stove, gotta find.
[00:23:50] Speaker B: And sometimes I have to touch it twice just to make sure it's hot. And I get burned both times.
So people, so people are like that. And at some point we're gonna have to figure out, is that stove really hot?
[00:24:01] Speaker A: You know, and you know, the guy who's taking martial arts, you know, like, man, what if I get hurt? Well, that's the point.
That's the point. Like, listen, man, you know, if you want to find out real quick, you know, what you are and what you aren't, and nobody's, for all intents and purposes, when you do martial arts, unless somebody's going to. The pros, people meter themselves when it comes to training. Yeah, there's that one or two guys in there, but most people are respectful. But for all intents and purposes, sure. If it's whether it's boxing, wrestling, karate, jiu jitsu, I'm telling you right now, like, you're gonna get, you're going to get choked out, you're going to get put to sleep, you going to get blasted. I don't care who you are, it's going to happen. So the idea that, you know, oh, well, I don't want to get in there because I don't want to get hit. It's a metaphor for life. Step in there so that you can find out what you can take. And more importantly, you can find out how to protect yourself from getting hit that hard because the difference between getting hit flush and turning your head about 2 inches off to the side is a monumental difference. It's the difference we get put to sleep. Yeah. You know what I mean, right?
It really is. It's. This is fun, man. Because, you know, it. It shows that what you. What you learned at that stage elevated you to a place of purity and be able to say, if I can do this, you sure as heck can.
[00:25:14] Speaker B: There is beauty in earning your stripes and taking your licks.
That. That's how we get refined. That's how we gain wisdom.
Can. Do you know any. I would say, you know any black belts and any martial arts that. That have not earned their stripes or taken their licks and gotten. Gotten jacked up, gotten put to sleep, you know? Like, do you know any that have ever made it all the way and become expert? Yeah. None. It doesn't exist. It's no different with any other area of life or any other pursuit.
[00:25:43] Speaker A: And would you want to be happy.
[00:25:45] Speaker B: You got to take your licks and.
[00:25:46] Speaker A: Would you train from somebody who didn't?
Would you. Would you? Honestly?
[00:25:51] Speaker B: Right?
[00:25:51] Speaker A: Oh, you. Come on, dude. Like, if I ever. I have taken a multitude of martial arts. If there was nobody who never suffered any injury, any butt whooping and was like, they are that third or second or first degree, whatever belt they were, I'd be like, I gotta go, man.
[00:26:07] Speaker B: Different dojo for me. I'm out.
[00:26:09] Speaker A: Not happening, brother. Like, come on, dude. You never got. You never got your butt handed to you, not once.
[00:26:15] Speaker B: I hope people realize that it's the same with their mentors and their coaches.
Because it's flooded. The truth, and I hate saying this, because this is like, these are my people, but it is flooded. That industry, coaching, mentoring, it's flooded with people who don't. Who haven't been to the place where they're trying to take you.
Okay? People come to me for business because they know that I built a business. I bootstrapped the company, built it to a multimillion dollar valuation with over 40 employees.
I've the fruits on the tree for me in my expertise at nlp. Guess what? I've been through crisis. I've been through my rock bottom. So, you know, some people just get to rock bottom and then, like, they try to work their way up. I, like, I hit it so hard, I bounced up. I hit it again.
[00:26:59] Speaker A: The way you just did that absolutely cracked, you know, because I just pictured some sort of cartoon character, like, right. Just flopping back up.
[00:27:05] Speaker B: That's what it felt like. I Swear at the time, dude, that's what it felt like. But yeah, all that to say, like, pick your coaches and mentors carefully because you want to make sure they either are where you want to be or have been and are now past right where you're trying to get to.
[00:27:22] Speaker A: And I think that says a lot too because, you know, ultimately we are, you know, kind of programmed to see the splashy images on YouTube and this isn't a knock to you or your profession, but people make very good videos and very good social media feeds. Right. And it's very easy to get captured by the image on screen and sort of not look at the substance of it and then pay for the course. And then that person just makes money off fees of courses as opposed to actually doing something tangible for you.
Yeah, it's like that in any, it's like that with any industry. It's irrelevant to, I don't say irrelevant to coaching, but it's not just to coaching, you know.
[00:27:59] Speaker B: Right. You're, you're absolutely right. It's relevant to every industry.
[00:28:01] Speaker A: For sure. It is. So I, let's talk about your public speaking. How do you, who asked you to speak and what events, you know, and is it corporations, businesses, individuals, local business chapters, common chambers of commerce?
[00:28:17] Speaker B: Kind of a little bit of, a little bit of everything.
You know, we have a, we have a women's conference in Chicago coming up in November. And I thought they want to, they want a male speaker and they do. They have, they have a few, they have, they have a few other male speakers over the two day period as well.
So, you know, and that's, so, you know, that's a business conference that's for, for female entrepreneurs.
There is a, there's, there's a tour called the Aspire Tour. It's the largest business tour in the country.
[00:28:45] Speaker A: Wonderful.
[00:28:45] Speaker B: And maybe the world. And you know, they go to like big markets, but they've been going to smaller markets. You know, in Columbus, Ohio, where I live, they're coming and they asked me to, to be on stage and address. There's a couple thousand people there that are ready to, to take the next step with their life in entrepreneurship and in business. I have spoken to small groups, churches. I've, I've, I've spoken to, I've been to schools and spoken to students.
I, My message is one that really could be tailored to anyone. And that's what I love about what I do. Because when it comes to the mind, we all have one, whether you're an entrepreneur, whether you're a 12 year old middle school kid. Like, you've got a mind and your mind works like everyone else's mind works. Maybe not identically, but pretty, pretty darn close.
And so I speak to lots of different people and I'm open to that and I love that because I'm not pigeonholed into only speaking to entrepreneurs. That's who I speak to the most because that's what I've been.
But really, I love catering my message to new audiences that this woman's conference. I'm so stoked. I cannot wait to get up there and talk.
[00:29:51] Speaker A: You'll have to share the clips with me too, because I'm really looking forward to seeing, you know, absolutely would love to. And I love all of your clips that I went to your Instagram feed. It was all positivity. It's all great vibes and energy and I would, you know, jump in the pool because, you know, we all laugh when, you know, if you're a boxing or mixed martial artist fan, it's easy to make a meme with somebody who got knocked out or choked out because that's the thing we do. But the person that's in the ring will say, I stepped into a place that you, you would never have done.
I, I was willing to get knocked out to, to prove my value and my worth. And that's fine that you laughed at it, but you can't do, you still wouldn't, you would never have the stones to come in there. And there's a small percentage of people that will do that. And then the crazy part about it is six months later they'll get knocked out again and it's just like, and then after a while you'll see them after the fight and they're just like, yep, hey man, that's the way you're like, dude, you just got, you know, you got memes for the rest of history and they don't care because that's just what they signed up for.
Right? It doesn't bother.
[00:30:54] Speaker B: I mean, imagine someone on fire on. Right, exactly. Imagine someone on fire to get a black belt. And they go to their friend, say it's a young, a young kid, young kid at school, high school, say, I'm gonna go get a black belt in, in, in, in, in Tang Soo Do. And I, I, I, I, like, I got that fire in me. Half their friends, maybe even more are gonna go, dude, come on, stop, stop. You're not gonna, you're not gonna do that. It's too hard. Yeah, you're going to quit like, just don't even start. If that same kid with the fire in his belly comes to you, Rashad, a black belt comes to you and he says, rashad, I want to be a black belt just like you. I've got a fire for this. And you see that fire in his eyes. What are you going to tell him? Are you going to tell him that he shouldn't, or are you going to tell him that he can?
[00:31:34] Speaker A: I'm going to. First thing I'm going to do is that absolutely can. It doesn't matter what age, but if you want to, here's how you're going to do it.
[00:31:39] Speaker B: Right.
[00:31:40] Speaker A: And you know.
[00:31:40] Speaker B: Yeah. See, that's beautiful.
[00:31:42] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:31:44] Speaker B: Because you've taken that road.
That's why you'll lift him up. And people who have had success, people who have won, like high achievers, they will be the first to tell someone, you can do it. You know, it's like a kid wants to dreams of being an NFL quarterback. His friends will say, you can't be an NFL quarterback. If he goes to Tom Brady and says, I want to be an NFL quarterback, Tom Brady's going to say, heck yeah, you can do it. Here's what it takes.
[00:32:09] Speaker A: Exactly. You know, and I remember that speech he gave when he was like, it is not easy getting up a scene six o' clock in the morning on Saturdays when your friends are eating waffles and pancake pancakes. And I remember he was like, he was like, you think it was fun? Like there's this myth that people. Oh, yeah, you know, yeah, I'm the greatest quarterback of all time. Or Michael, you think? Michael Jordan. Yeah. Like, you think it didn't suck? Like, yeah, it sucked. Heck yeah, it sucked. He was like, you know, everybody's sleep, people are watching cartoons. But the flip side to it is, is seeing it is seeing the success on the other end. People don't, you know, yeah, everybody loves the birthday cake. Everybody loves a great meal. But nobody's there when the cooking takes place because the cooking sucks. Right.
[00:32:47] Speaker B: Like the cooking is really muddled or the cleanup, bro. Yeah, you're right.
[00:32:51] Speaker A: Me and, and, and trash cans and loading up the car. But they love when the dinner's done. Right. So we're, that's right. We're very programmed for the end result, but not the crappy stuff in between it, man. Really, you know, that's right. It's, it's.
[00:33:05] Speaker B: What you said it.
[00:33:05] Speaker A: Well, it's just true. So, you know, where can people find you? And ultimately, you know, that's really? What I like to ask the guests, you obviously have done food for yourself, but for the purpose of the show, where can people find you?
[00:33:18] Speaker B: Thank you. Yeah, so Instagram, Eli Bowman. If you go to Facebook, it's just Eli Bowman. You can search my name. You'll see it verified on both Twitter. Eli Bowman.
And, you know, like, it's just. I'm out there. Just my socials are where I'm most active.
You can go to Eli Bowman.com and you can get in touch with me there, there. But, yeah, I'm.
[00:33:41] Speaker A: I'm around.
[00:33:41] Speaker B: Would love to. Would love to connect with anybody.
[00:33:43] Speaker A: Yeah. There's a great sign inside the place. I do Jiu Jitsu. It says, embrace the suck. Right?
It's just like. Yeah.
[00:33:49] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:33:50] Speaker A: Yeah. That's exactly what time is. It really is, man. You know, and I would encourage everybody, you know, look at, you know, even, like a podcast, right? Like, I was terrified of doing it. You know, I'm a guy who knew a lot of random things, and my biggest fear was, you know, am I good enough to get guests? And then if I get guests, am I good enough to hold a good conversation? And I got to be honest with you, you know, I'm not going to say I'm great at it, but I've kind of at least done halfway decent enough to keep getting people coming on there, so.
[00:34:17] Speaker B: Dude, this was a very natural. This was a great conversation. I'm so glad I came on. This was awesome.
[00:34:22] Speaker A: Love connecting with guys like you, man. People like you as well, too, because I think that human potential and, you know, it's almost like the movie Gattaca, right? Like, look at Ethan. I don't know if you ever seen that movie, right? Ethan. Yeah, the guy. You know, for people who haven't seen it, it's a great movie where people were genetically. So good people were genetically engineered. He wasn't. And he still had to get where he needed to get, right? And it's such a. It's a. It's a. It's a movie about life, right? It really is. It's so plug.
[00:34:47] Speaker B: So 100%. I love that movie. That's a great. That's a great map across.
[00:34:50] Speaker A: It's a fantastic film. So I appreciate you, brother. And like I said, all the best wishes to your continued success.
[00:34:57] Speaker B: Thanks, Rashad. Appreciate it, man.
[00:34:58] Speaker A: Anytime.
That was a blast.
